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The Ukrainian Hustle

Don’t Mess with Texas, Ukrop!

The Gonzo Fist (2000px)

He arrived shortly before twilight, the frosty December wind swirled about him. Wide-brim hat and boots wet from the snow covering the streets of Donetsk, he slipped out of a couple of camo packs and shook my hand vigorously. His grin looked like it would never drop away.
We sat at the table, across from each other. Cowboy Mitch started spinning yarns about life in Texas. Tales of herds and tough work, of chicks and fun, and all-night drinking bouts. He pulled out a pic of him taken with Willie Nelson and told me about the time he kicked Ted Nugent’s ass in a TV show on Marijuana legalization back in ’92. It was no brag, just facts.
But all that was back in the day. Once he got here, the Donbass was the only place he could be.

“The Donbass somehow reminds me of Mexico, the good old Mexico of my youth. Donetsk strikes me as a pretty sophisticated city, but the hinterland is a little bit hillbilly. I grew up in southern Texas, and spent much time in Mexico and loved it. I still do, but things have changed there too. Now Mexico is a satellite of the US and they’ve almost let it descend into civil war. They chop off more heads there than they do in Syria.
When NATO invaded Libya three years ago, I knew how false it was what the mainstream media and the US government were reporting. The murder of Gaddafi was such a shameful thing and made me very angry. Then, it was Syria. The US foddered and gave weapons to the so-called rebels: the ones chopping off heads and eating people’s livers.
I’ve followed the Maidan fake revolution from the very beginning. From the Kiev Hotel, where the CIA was located, the snipers fired against the two opposing parties, the crowd and the police. When I saw Victoria Nuland and John McCain hanging up over there, I knew it was gonna be very, very long time… The US overthrew another democratically elected government.
Yanukovych was no righteous president, but he was legit and made the bright decision not to go with the EU and the IMF for it was the best for Ukrainian people. But that was not what the US wanted. Then, the Donbass revolt started, and the Odessa pogrom was made. And war, eventually. I saw the Lugansk City Hall hit with rockets fired by a Ukrainian fighter jet. And that lady, Inna, her legs were blown off and she was still alive, only for a minute, and she was looking straight into the camera. I felt like she was looking straight at me. I said, that’s enough, man. Somebody’s got to do that. I started saving money, and when the family gathered in Dallas for Thanksgiving dinner, I told them I was going to the Donbass. The next day I rode to Huston and got on a flight to Russia. While in Rostov, I saw the picture of that 19-years-old boy, Misha, at the Hospital in Donetsk. His feet were gone, his right hand was gone, his eyes were gone, but he was smiling. And that was no forced smile. It was such a beautiful smile. It was like, I did my part. He bravely volunteered. He went right to the front, close to where artillery shell came down. His heroism can never be questioned or diminished in any way. That’s just from what he suffered and sacrificed. What more do you need for knowing that you’re on the right track to come here?
I had a nice easy life in Texas. A brother and a sister who I’m very close to, my dad, a girlfriend. I had a good job, I was good at it and my boss was very sad to see me go. I had a nice easy life back there indeed, and I just decided that I didn’t want a nice easy life. I wanted to make a difference, I wanted to help the people of Donbass make history, change the course of events from going down.
We’re gonna win! And even if I didn’t believe that, even if I thought it was like the Alamo or Dien Bien Phu, I would still be here. These people are defending themselves against evil Nazi bastards, so they have no choice but to fight to the end. They can’t leave their grandmothers, children, wives and sisters to the tender mercy of the Azov Battalion and the fucking Pravy Sektor. They are not gonna surrender. I believe courage and motivation are the determining factors to win a war. Look at the Lebanon war, a few years back. The Israelis tried to invade and Hezbollah whipped their ass. Hezbollah and the Cubans, they really set the example for me of what can be done when people are determined.
I expect all the land from Kharkov to Odessa will become its own country, Novorossiya. Probably within the next year or two the people of Western Ukraine will be fed up from being robbed and raped by Nazi bastards, and they will raise up too. Oligarchs and Nazis will be defeated and destroyed as they deserve to be, and hopefully Ukraine will go back to being the beautiful country it was until a year ago. This cannot happen under the Nazi rule of Pravy Sektor, Kolomoisky and Poroshenko. Not under the rule of the US. Because the US is a fascist government.
The US is going downhill, man. And it seems like it’s going down faster and faster. The middle class is being squeezed to extinction. My grandfather and my father, and to some extent myself too, lived in the best generations to be in America. That was the time when you still had a chance. Only 10 years ago I worked as a lumberjack 5 days and less than 40 hours a week, and I brought home $1,000 per week. I could afford a good car and whatever I needed. The guys who do that very job now, they are working 6 days a week and bring home $700 per week. And it’s not enough.
People get the government they deserve, they say. But I really didn’t believe we could have a president worse than George W. Bush.
This afternoon I had an interview at the Military Intelligence—one of the steps in the enlistment procedure. Those guys were no joke at all. They were very serious about this business and questioned me for 3 hours. Since I’d written in my application that as a combat engineer and sapper, my specialty in the Army was demolition, I was asked about IEDs, directional explosives and stuff like that. Then they offered me a coffee and we smoked.
And one of them asked, ‘Do you think the US government had any involvement in the conspiracy of 9/11?’
I said, ‘Of course, they did!’
Because three buildings fell down that day and one did not get hit by a plane. As a demolition specialist, I know how it looks like when a building is blown up from within the interior, and that’s what happened. You either believe your own eyes that it’s a fact, of if the government says the sun rises in the West, you say, Yeah, it does and you get along better. America is no more the land of freedom, man.
If only the Americans would pull their head out of their asses and face the truth and then stand up and do something about it! The redemption of America can only be done by the people of America. It’s tough, man. I’m in the Donbass to fight Nazis and there are many Nazis in the US also, but there I’d be fighting them alone.
If it comes down to dying here, that’d be for me the perfect end. If you’ve got to die for something, that’s a good thing to die for. I have to leave my bones somewhere and Donbass might be a fine place to do that. Che Guevara has always been one of my greatest heroes. He died on foreign soil at 39, so I’m already 15 years down the road from that. I’ve lived longer than I’ve ever thought I would. You know, I’m a cowboy from Texas, I’d rather die with my boots on.”

About Christian B. Malaparte

Christian B. Malaparte is a freelance writer mainly engaged in debunking the misrepresentation of facts in the mainstream media. He was in Donbass from the outbreak of hostilities in April 2014 until February 2015, and reported in real time the shelling of civilian homes in Kramatorsk and Donetsk by the Ukrainian Armed Forces. He currently resides in Russia.


4 thoughts on “Don’t Mess with Texas, Ukrop!

  1. Thank you, Christian, so much! Very nice article, impossible to read it without crying. And so happy to hear about brave man from Texas

    Posted by Valentina | Tuesday, December 23, 2014, 6:00 PM


  1. Pingback: A Texan in Donbass | Under Siege - Monday, December 22, 2014

  2. Pingback: Texas Chronicles 6: The Red Cat, the dragon and the SBU | Essence of Time - Tuesday, January 26, 2016

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